


Hanschen Would Have Added More Sex

by eracitor



Category: DWSA, Deaf West Spring Awakening, Spring Awakening
Genre: American Sign Language, Deaf Character, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-06 16:29:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11604465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eracitor/pseuds/eracitor
Summary: This is a short, fluff Hernst one-shot because I'm in love with Deaf West Spring AwakeningNote: The bold indicates that someone is signing rather than speaking. It also is not a direct translation, as American Sign Language has vastly different grammar and syntax. The bold is how an interpreter would read their signing.





	Hanschen Would Have Added More Sex

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, every now and then I edit this if I see grammatical/cultural errors. Thanks

One of the scariest parts of being in love with a deaf boy was what was keeping Hanschen from confessing his attraction. Hanschen was no prude, and he certainly wasn’t shy, but every time he looked at Ernst, the way his smiles lit up his face. How excited he got about his interests--theatre, literature, taking walks in the courtyard--were what made Hanschen fall in love with him in the first place. After all, someone as handsome as he would not fall for anyone _normal_. He loved how passionate Ernst was about his culture, how he had a kindness and naivety Hanschen would never have or want but it suited him, how his eyes ate up all the stories Melchior told of sex and lust. Ernst was so the opposite of Hanschen, falling in love with the world as it came to him, which made it so strange that Hanschen should fall in love with him at all.

 **Hey.** Ernst waved at him now, approaching his friend’s locker. **Have you seen your roommate?**

 **No.** Hanschen slapped his first three fingers together. **I’ve been….preoccupied.**

Ernst raised his eyebrows in question, although he delighted in watching Hanschen sign. Although deaf people tended to always have a less robotic way of sign, Hanschen was a CODA and had learned ASL straight from the source. His signs were like his personality: beautiful but dramatic, and Ernst loved it.

 **I’ve been thinking about a certain Benvolio all day**. Hanschen flirted shamelessly, the only romantic advancement he allowed himself because Ernst would never take it seriously. After all, he was one slip-up away from full-on confessing his love and worship to someone who wasn’t himself and who’s name rhymed with Hernst.

 **You snuck into play rehearsal again?** Ernst’s face turned bright red, rubbing his toe in the ground in an embarrassed manner. **So you saw me trip in the middle of stage?**

 **Yeah.** Hanschen smirked, eying Ernst with a soulful look that he saved especially for his adorable best friend. **I must admit my legs stop working when I’m around you too.**

Ernst waved him off, glancing around. **I haven’t seen Moritz all day. He got a letter from his parents. If you see him, could you tell him?**

 **Of course**. Hanschen replied, and with that Ernst was off, a little skip in his step, leaving behind only a lingering scent of something outdoorsy. Although the worry lined his face, there was something so easy in the way that he walked, as if the burdens of the world hadn’t reached his shoulders yet.

 _Although,_ Hanschen thought to himself. _The burdens merely slipped right off my own shoulders_.

He shrugged this off, grabbing his own books from his locker and continuing to class. His first class of the day was Calculus, not something he generally enjoyed or was apt at, but he was good enough to to maintain good grades as long as he did a little studying after class. The trick to education was finding the exact amount of effort you have to have to be good without trying too hard. Melchior certainly excelled at this, if only because he was brilliant. Guys like Ernst and Moritz ought to have learned this technique ages ago.

Still, he couldn’t help but find his mind drifting today. His father had the audacity to ask what Hanschen wanted to do with the rest of his life. With the rest of his life? He knew what his dad _wanted_ him to do. He wanted him to become a lawyer, make lots of money, and impregnate his future wife, and possibly his future second wife. But Hanschen had never been a fan of doing anything but what he pleased. He _wanted_ to go to college and major in something interesting, although he wasn’t sure what. He _wanted_ to do all sorts of crazy things like skydiving, or smoking Cuban cigars at a strip club, who knows, maybe even cocaine. He _wanted_ to have sex with as many beautiful people as he pleased.

Or maybe just one person that he pleased.

He shook his head. Hanschen really wasn’t the commitment type. Sex was best when it was like tasting flavors at an ice cream shop. Sex was best when you had so many flavors to compare. He wasn’t sure Ernst had ever been with anyone, let alone a male, and knew that Ernst would need to try other flavors before he could ever fall in love with Hanschen back, that is, if he _did_ feel the same way.

That was the scary part of being in love with a deaf boy. Ernst wore his heart on his sleeve, and he spoke with his hands; you could see every emotion in the way that he signed, in his lips and his eyes. To break someone’s heart, out in the open like that, would be detrimental.

 _Although, I perhaps am idealizing him_ , Hanschen contemplated. _Ernst is far stronger than even I know at times._

He could remember Ernst offering Ilse a cigarette after she was kicked out of her house, both of them sitting and chatting together. She’d  tried to convince everyone she was fine, just fine, and even Hanschen had almost believed it. But then Ernst wrapped his arm around her shoulder and suddenly her happy facade faded, and she began to cry. How Ernst turned his body from the group, signing something only Ilse could see. Ilse then straightened her spine, wiping away tears and lifting her chin. Despite the naive almost innocence Hanschen found in Ernst, he wasn’t pure of heart. He’d see things others had not, that maybe others forced upon him. He was kind despite it.

 _Who wouldn’t fall in love with someone like that?_ Hanschen sighed, trapped in his own mind.

There was a tapping on his shoulder. He turned around, surprised to see Martha sitting beside him.

 **Fall in love with who?** She signed eagerly, watching Hanschen’s face carefully. She was wearing a green overall/dress over her white polo. The dress cut off at her knees, which were slightly scraped.

**What?**

**You said, ‘Who wouldn’t fall in love with someone like that?’**

Hanschen sighed. Of course he’d accidentally muttered with his hands. Being bilingual meant that his first language, American Sign Language, always came too naturally, but being hearing meant that sometimes he assumed he was alone in his knowledge. Being at school forced him to realize he was certainly not alone in this skill set.

 **Who wouldn’t fall in love with me?**  Hanschen explained, with a forced smug look, but Martha believed it, rolling her eyes.

 **Just about anyone**. Martha scowled.

 **Let’s play a game.** Hanschen grinned, glancing up at the teacher, who was writing on the board with his back turned. He was deep in lecture, and Hanschen had studied this the night before on his own so he had no fear of being behind in his work. **Fuck. Marry. Kill.**

 **Okay!** Martha agreed eagerly. She had never been a fan of calculus and would rather just have her best friend Anna explain it later, as sometimes the teacher would work and forget to explain it in sign language. The teachers at this dreaded school were truly something.

**Otto, Moritz, and…. Georg.**

**Okay! Uhhhh….** She said, delighted by the game, her fingers twiddled back in forth as she thought of an answer. **Fuck Moritz. Marry Otto. Kill Georg.**

**You wouldn’t marry Moritz?**

**Well, he’s certainly dreamy.** She said, sighing heavily and staring off in space, before shaking her head, returning to reality. **But he’s too neurotic to marry. Not like Otto. He is more marriage material. Not at all Georg. Georg is neither handsome nor mature.**

**Fair enough….hmmm, what about Melchior, me, Georg.**

She seemed to think about this for a moment longer than before, pulling on her braids in deep thought. **I think...fuck Melchior...marry Georg and kill you.**

Hanschen gasped as though he was scandalized.

 **You’re simply not committed and god knows where your dick has been.** Martha explained, and they both burst out in laughter.

 **Touche.** He replied. **What about...Melchior, Otto, and Ernst.**

**Oh, easy. Marry Ernst, fuck Melchior, kill Otto.**

Hanschen’s eyebrows shot up. **Really? Marry Ernst?**

**Everyone knows that Ernst would make a perfect partner.**

**Why?**

**He’s sweet and kind. He’s optomistic, and he works very hard. I would always know that he would never hurt me.**

**Would you want to be with him?** Hanschen wondered, his mind suddenly whirring into overdrive. He’d never thought that maybe someone else noticed all of Ernst’s good traits. He’d never imagined that someone would take interest in him, even though Ernst was adorable and kind-hearted. Boy, was Hanschen an idiot.

Martha considered this. **I wouldn’t mind if he asked me out.** **Oh, but don’t tell him! Please!**

 **I would never**. Hanschen swore, making a cross over his heart, but his mind had shifted into overdrive. Perhaps it was for the best that Ernst should fall in love with someone else. True heartbreak is believing there is someone out there better than who you are with. It happened with Hanschen, the first time he fell in love with Genevieve. He’d been restless, unable to keep only her on his mind, and their, well, whatever-it-was fell apart. It broke Genevieve, but it broke him too, knowing that true love was nothing but another lie that their parents told them.

  
  
  


**Moritz! I have a letter from your father!** Ernst signed once he had his friend’s attention. Today Moritz seemed particularly gloomy, with dark circles lining his highs and his mouth in one thin line. His entire body drooped like a waterless flower.

 **Not again.** Moritz ripped it from Ernst’s grips, although not angrily. He looked defeated as he tore it open. **The same old shit. You’ve failed us. You’ve failed your mother. You’ve failed me. Blah blah blah.**

 **You’ve been working really hard, even Mrs. Gabor has said so.** Ernst pointed out, but Moritz waved him off.

 **It’s never enough.** Moritz signed miserably. **Although, at least I’m not at home.**

Ernst’s eyebrows drew in. He didn’t like the looks of what Moritz was signing. **What do you mean?**

 **Nothing** . Moritz signed quickly, but he sighed. **He’s a little...rough.**

 **I’m glad you’re not home too.** Ernst brought Moritz into a hug before pointing at the letter. **Your father has no idea what he’s saying. You’re working hard. Hell, you’re even on the varsity basketball team.**

 **Yeah.** Moritz admitted. **Maybe, you’re right. Thanks.**

 **Any time.** Ernst replied, and with that Moritz started off towards his next class. Something still seemed off about him, though, and it worried Ernst. He knew that the adults had a skillful way of completely ruining the children around them, and he would hate to see any of his friends go through the pain of trying to find a way to heal alone.

Tightening the straps on his bag, he walked quickly in the direction of the Math hall in an attempt to find Hanschen. The blond boy was merely a few steps away, though, talking with Martha.

 **Hey there.** She waved. He waved back, friendly as always.

 **I’ll leave you two alone.** Hanschen wiggled his eyebrows, earning a glare from Martha and a confused look from Ernst.

 **Actually, I need to talk to you.** He glanced at Martha. **Alone, if that’s alright.**

**That’s fine! See ya.**

Hanschen sighed. **You know, you’re never going to get a girlfriend if you treat a girl like that.**

 **What?** Ernst questioned, before shaking his head. **Whatever. I found Moritz. Has he seemed odd to you lately?**

 **Not that I can remember. Why?** Hanshen inquired.

 **I don’t know. Just curious.** Ernst replied, wondering if maybe he imagined it. If maybe he was just reflecting his own tragic past on other people.

**Are you interested in Moritz?**

**What? Why are you suddenly interested in who I like?** Ernst questioned him, honestly confused as to why Hanschen would want to know. He’d never asked him about it before.

**Oh, so you do like Moritz.**

**No!** Ernst stared at Hanschen, really looking into his face. **Are you into Moritz?**

 **Of course not, he’s got baggage.** Hanschen teased, making Ernst’s face light up with a smile.

**What about Melchi?**

**You should never date someone who’s as good looking as you.** Hanschen winked.

**Ilse?**

**Too naughty.**

**Wendla?**

**Too nice.**

**Otto?**

**I do like a salty little sailor.** Hanschen grinned devilishly, which only spurred on Ernst’s loud guffaws. **But I could never deal with his Oedipus complex.**

**What about me?**

This startled Hanschen, as unexpected as it was and with a playful twinkle in Ernst’s dark brown eyes. Hanschen did the American Sign Language version of stammering which was him basically moving his hands as though he was going to sign something but failing to find a sign that fit what he was thinking. Finally he lamely finished, **Martha would kill me.**

 **Why?** Ernst wondered, and it struck Hanschen that maybe he shouldn’t have signed that. He had been sworn to secrecy after all.

 **No reason**. He signed quickly, avoiding Ernst’s eyes, but Ernst jumped back into his vision.

 **Hey!** He waved at Hanschen urgently. **Does Martha...like me?**

Hanschen hesitated and that was all it took. Ernst’s hand lept to his face, covering his mouth, and he looked utterly stunned. **Martha likes me.**

 **I wasn’t supposed to tell you.** Hanschen sighed, not entirely surprised that he’d spilled the beans. Hanschen had loose lips, what could he say, and it didn’t help that he’d rather die than admit he was in love with someone, especially his usually oblivious best friend. **We were talking about it and she doesn’t want to tell you or anything.**

 **I guess it’s a bad time to say that I actually like someone else.** Ernst frowned, and Hanschen’s eyebrows shot up but Ernst didn’t elaborate. He was too deep in thought. Of course, he’d had a major crush on Hanschen for a long time, but everyone had a crush on Hanschen. He was good-looking and he was bursting with confidence, which was one of the most attractive traits someone could have in Ernst’s mind. Still, Ernst was used to just being friends that it almost didn’t bother him not having Hanschen to himself. Sure, at time, it was trying when Hanschen stripped out of his clothes at sleepovers like a certified hooker. Yeah, it sucked hearing about the ladies or lads that Hanschen conquered that week. But Ernst never found the crush to be anything more than a nice daydream. His friendship was the reality, and he was okay with it.

**So you do like Moritz!**

**No.** Ernst smirked, and again this behavior surprised Hanschen. He was being especially playful today and it pulled at the blond boy’s heartstrings.

**Who then?**

**I’m. Not. Telling. You.** Ernst grinned. Hanschen was stunned.

**We tell each other everything!**

**Not everything….** Ernst signed cryptically and with a wave goodbye he was gone. Oh lord, Hanschen was a goner.

  
  
  


**Hanschen wants to know who you like.** Georg signed after getting Ernst’s attention, much to Hanschen’s disapproval. Yes, he was the type to bribe his friend’s to get the information out of Ernst, and yes he was the type to hide in the closet and wait for Ernst to spill the beans.

 **I can’t see why he needs to know.** Ernst shook his head, swiping down on his phone as he looked at Instragram in between talking with Georg. They, as roommates, worked pretty well. Every now and then one would grab the other’s attentions and make a comment. They’d continue their activities and then the other would draw attention to themselves and reply. It was slow but it worked for them.

Ernst had a new obsession with kayaking, something he’d learned about from Otto. He wasn’t a huge fan of sailboats, if only because Otto had bored him to death talking about it on occasion, but kayaks looked like a lot of fun. Something about the way you had to paddle it and how all the pictures made the kayakers look like adventurers. For a moment, he allowed himself to imagine Hanschen and him kayaking together, but quickly dismissed the idea. Too many factors that would ruin Hanschen’s hair; he could never convince that guy to go with him. He thought about inviting Otto.

Georg leaned over, tapping his shoulder. **Is it anyone we know?**

**It’s hard not to know him.**

Hanschen, from the closet, was barely getting most of this and felt silly for thinking he would ever be able to see from the closet. Now he was stuck there, in a closet next to Georg’s smelly gym shoes and a whole stack of plays written by Shakespeare. Hanschen didn’t usually mind Shakespeare but it was uncomfortable to sit on, especially while Georg’s feet smell radiated from his shoes.

**It’s a silly fantasy anyway. Nothing real.**

Georg, who decidedly hated the idea of doing this for Hanschen who seemed to be going to extreme measures to learn that his future boyfriend liked him, contemplated this. He’d had fantasy after fantasy of his piano instructor. Did that make his affection for her any less real? He still had a lot of respect for her, and he still wanted to bone her all the same. It was certainly food for thought.

**Hey. Just because it’s a fantasy doesn’t mean it isn’t real.**

**Maybe.** Ernst replied. **I’m going to go find Otto.** With that he jumped to his feet and trotted cheerfully out of the room, excited to tell Otto about kayaking and possibly convincing him to go with him.

At this, Hanschen left the closet. “You need to clean your sneakers.”

“And you need to get a life,” Georg replied dryly, opening up a textbook.

“Where did he go?”

“On his way to talk to Otto,” Georg told him begrudgingly.

“He’s in love with Otto.”

“You really are an idiot.”

“Who, then?”

Georg just shook his head, pressing his glasses further up the ridge of his nose.No matter how many questions Hanschen peppered him with, in American Sign Language or Spoken English, he refused to answer. Irritated, Hanschen left, wondering what scheme he would have to come up with next.

He finally returned to his own dorm, falling onto his bed dramatically. A tap on his shoulder told him Moritz had something to say to him, and he really didn’t want to talk but who was he kidding? He was Hanschen. He loved to gab.

Hanschen flopped onto his back, looking at a dark-haired Mortiz.

**Hey. What’s up?**

**My love life is so complicated.** Hanschen pouted, keeping the drama as usual. **Are you in love with anyone?**

**You’re very attractive and I’m flattered but I have to decline.**

**I’m not in love with you.** Hanschen rolled his eyes, sighing loudly even though his roommate couldn’t hear it.

**I like someone but I...don’t know, I have...no idea.**

**Specific.** Hanschen signed sarcastically.

 **Well, I liked Ilse for a long time.** Moritz began. **She’s so beautiful, and I know I loved her. But my mind was greedy. I always wanted more.**

 **And now?** Hanschen was eager to know how to kill this curse, the constant want for something else someone else. He didn't feel it now, as he was head-over-heels for Ernst, but he was terrified that he would and he would break his own heart, not to mention Ernst's.

 **Now I’ve realized that if you’re looking elsewhere, you will. But that doesn’t mean you always will.** Moritz said, stretching his legs onto his pillow. **That doesn’t mean you can’t choose not to.**

**I guess….**

**But this stuff doesn’t even truly matter.**

Hanschen looked at him. **No?**

**No, it doesn’t. Even though all I can think about is what Martha's doing and what she would do with me. But you know, there’s school and family and a whole future ahead of us. There’s too much going on for us to worry, I think.**

Hanschen stared at his friend. Moritz looked tired but for the first time in a long time, he looked somewhat hopeful. And it dawned on him that they were all kids, just kids, worrying about love and sex and school just because adults were obsessed with worrying. It wasn't worth it. **I think maybe you’re right.**

  
  
  


After theatre practice the next day, Ernst sat on the piano stool, pressing some of the keys and wish they vibrated much more. He could barely feel them. Otto had agreed last night to take him kayaking some time next month, once it was warmer. That seemed fair to Ernst, who would hate to be cold and wet in a kayak with a boat freak who would most likely not see that as an excuse to stop paddling.

Suddenly he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around and saw Hanschen. **You snuck into theatre rehearsal again?**

**I didn’t sneak. I pranced.**

Ernst giggled watching Hanschen use the classifier, his two fingers prancing around like a small little Hanschen. He breathed in Hanschen’s sent, some sort of uber manly deodarante spray that was just up Hanschen’s alley. It smelled nice and fresh on him though.

 **Do you like the piano?** Ernst inquired, touching the keys almost nervously. They were entirely alone and Hanschen had spent the day somewhere else, seemingly off in a different world. They’d barely even chatted all day.

Hanschen paused. **I guess so.**

**It reminds me of the church my parents go to. It seems very peaceful.**

Hanschen just shrugged. For a moment they were both still, neither of them speaking, neither of them daring to look at the other. Before long, Hanschen found Ernst’s eyes. It was in his eyes that Ernst understood what Hanschen had been thinking about all day. And without a single word signed between them, they came together, kissing passionately in the middle of the auditorium, on a piano stool.

Hanschen waved down Ernst so his full attention was on his words. I **want to remember this thirty years from now and still have fond memories of it.**

**What do you mean?**

**I mean, I want to be with you, maybe forever. But I don't want to, well, ruin things.**

**It won't be ruined if it's us together.** Ernst's face was so serious that it nearly broke Hanschen's heart.

 **Gross.** Hanschen winked, giving him a light slug on the shoulder. **Is this the cheesy shit I have to look forward to?**

**And what else do we have to do until then?**

**More of this.** Hanschen dipped his head, cupping Ernst’s face in both of his hands. They kissed again, over and over until they couldn't feel their lips anymore.

**I love you, as I have never loved anyone.**

**As you should.** Hanschen smirked, before putting on a faux **I promise to be gentle, baby.**

 **You’re disgusting.** Ernst teased, although he continued kissing Hanschen, their lips unable to leave each other’s for more than a few seconds.

  
  


Later that night, when Hanschen and Ernst burst into the room and began making out passionately on Hanschen’s bed, Moritz felt a lot of regret for ever helping him with his romance problem. He quickly took his things to Ernst and Georg’s room, where Georg merely signed, without any hint of surprise, **They’re together?**

**Yep.**


End file.
